It's just one of those days when I feel totally drained. Physically, mentally and emotionally. It's been a rough rough day and an emotional roller-coaster ride
Oct 28, will always be a special date for me for many reasons. One of which being the anniversary of my first class at Parkway Parade on Oct 28, 2006. 3 years ago. That also means that I've been conducting classes for 3 years. And that's 12 releases.
While the passion remains, sometimes I just feel physically weaker than before. Perhaps I'm getting older, perhaps my work has taken its toll, hours have restriced my gym time, stress has made me more lethargic, sometimes I really look forward to going NZ Auckland for those filming trips where I just get off from work and market levels and totally de-stress by going for classes.
Even when I want to dedicate more time to workout, I can't seem to find the time. I know I'm not the most sociable person around, I don't make effort to make new friends because I find that I'm already too busy to juggle my existing friendships to handle new ones.
Mentally, I'm drained. I'm lacking new ideas for both my work and my personal finances. It's draining to consistently think of profitable and executable ideas on a DAILY BASIS. I'm freaking tired.
Recently, I made some promises, both to myself and my potential business partners on setting up a small business. I need some capital to do that. I need to fulfill my promise, and generate some returns of my own.
Emotionally, today was such an emotional roller-coaster that I'm completely worn out.
How do I explain the delight when I knew that I'll be the first one that sent tt out?
How do I explain the resignment I felt when I realised certain things should be kept the way it is?
How do I explain the 'sian-ness' at having to go to office just like it was another day at work?
How do I explain the exhilaration I felt when I was driving through PIE during lunchtime?
How do I explain the satisfaction I felt at my negotation skills?
How do I explain the disgust at being accused of something I didn't do?
How do I explain the seething anger of being screamed at over the phone, by a customer who has made money in a 100% of her 60+ trades, but is in a paper deficit for just 1 trade which hasn't even been realised yet? Sore loser.
How do I explain the exasperation at being threatened by a BITCH?
How do I explain my relief at meeting one of my best friends, Mr Scorpio, to treat him a birthday dinner and release all my frustrations?
I could do with a break. Really. I wished I had chosen Plan A. Right now, I wouldn't be doing all this.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Tracks from the 20s
With BC41 fully out of the way, I've started mixing the tracks for my classes once again. I'm due a personal review on BC41, which I'll probably get down to writing soon.
Anyway for my recent classes, I've been mixing tracks from the 20s releases, namely the D&R tracks from BC21-30. It's been fantastic, the reception has been wonderful, and the decibels have been rising. I realise many of us (including myself) do love the tracks from these releases, and have been having a blast in class.
These releases were the ones that I'm most familiar with, because this was the period when I started falling in love with BC, and started to notice the tracks. I was trained in BC27, started TT during BC29 days, and my first proper new release was BC30.
Back then because there weren't that many releases and tracks to choose from, I mainly rotated from BC21-30 post-launch, with the occasional odd tracks from BC13-20. No offence to Nathaniel and Gabby, but I just prefer Dan & Rach's tracks.
Even now, the memories of yesteryear still linger strongly and I can still remember how I felt when the releases were launched.
I didn't remember much about BC21/22 - maybe I didn't really enjoy the releases then. BC23 was the first release where I really loved the music and moves. The mickey mouse tone in 'Stuck On You' where everyone would automatically shout on the RH kicks. Then there was 'Field of Dreams', which was love at first hear, and how the crowd loved doing the 'Energy' part. Even 18 releases later, Field of Dreams is one of my all time favourites. 'Hardcore Paradise' blew me away then. I couldn't get enough of it, though now it's slightly more subdued cos I found other MT tracks I like more. What about that shoulder blaster in 'Retro Rush'. Solid. 'Breathe Easy' had that lovely kata.
BC24, after such a fantastic BC23 release, was a letdown. From the get-go, I think participants were disappointed. The warm up deviated from the usual shout on RH kicks, cos the choreo was a shuffle forward then RH. A bit of momentum lost there. I remember how our gang simply refused to do the circular uppercuts in 'I Feel Alive'. 'She Bangs' was probably a universal disaster across classes as most people didn't want to get down on the floor. The other tracks didn't really capture our imagination.
BC25 was a release I remember for special reason. I bumped into this instructor (shan't reveal who) who was practising the new release, and I basically got a full preview of the entire class prior to launch. The release was a breath of fresh air. Catchy songs such as 'Angels' and 'Luv U More' wowed the crowd, and it was hilarious when people couldn't get the step pattern in the latter track. 'Jigga Jigga' - what adjective can I allocate this track? At that point of time, I could have sworn it was the best track ever. 'Power of Love' the speedball and stomp track is from this release too. Everyone loved it. The T7/8 combo of 'Electro Violence' and 'Crescendoes of Ecstasy' wasn't the instructors' favourites, but they have remained one of my favourites even now.
BC26 - a semi-letdown? The upper warm up was dreadfully boring, 'Scream' was a power track that virtually all instructors (including myself) have binned. The redeeming factor for this release was T7/8 - 'Rhythm & Police' and 'Night Life'. The dark music got the mood going and I can hardly remember the number of times I got high on these 2 tracks. There were hits and misses for this release.
BC27 - I trained in this release, and did it so many times in training that I got a little bored of the release when it was finally launched. There were a few fantastic tracks in this release. During launch, I felt that the warm up was the best ever. The 'Bom Bom Suenan' sounds really got me going. 'Genie in a Bottle' was slightly subdued but there were refreshing tracks such as 'Tribal Dance', 'Bad & Sexy'. 'So What' was the feature of the release for me with its jump knees. 'Neckbreaker' busted my lungs. How about the cooldown - what a lovely way to finish the class.
BC28 - This was the first ever release that I liked T1 to T8. 'The Final Countdown', 'Come With Me' came from this release. Who could possibly hate 'Hymn'? Such an energetic number. During launch, I knew the classes hated 'Hung Up'. It was something different and many people just walked out. I was disappointed. Then there was 'Fight' - the first ever Rock based Muay Thai track, which I love to bits even now. Then 'Reach Out'? I loved the buildup for this track. The best thing from this release? The cooldown - Because Of You.
BC29 - This was a very good release that featured the double knife strike in the warm up as well as T6 - 'Vogue'. I knew several instructors hated 'Action' but not me. I loved 'Fly Away' and 'Heartbeatz'. There was one track which I binned - 'Blade'. Loved the cooldown 'Broken'.
BC30 - This was the first release that I had to learn as an instructor and I can't really comment from the participant point of view. All I can say is that I'm ashamed that I hated this release from the start (just after receiving the DVD) because after I practised and launched the full class, I loved this release to bits. Fav tracks include the lower warm up 'Somebody Told Me', 'Shooting Star', 'Rock Me Amadeus' - love love love this ESK track! Those were the days when I was still starting out new, and I was terribly conscious of the fact that I'll not be a good role model if I can't execute the ESK well, so I definitely spent some time practising this move. I kept doing ESK tracks in my class and had to endure a series of walkouts for this track. Guess 11 releases down the road, this has paid dividends.
Well, I've written a bit more than what I had expected to, all this just came to mind and I wrote it all out. Sometimes I really miss being just a participant, where I don't know much and can just enjoy my class as it is. But it's like once you've swam to the other shore, you can't really swim back.
Anyway for my recent classes, I've been mixing tracks from the 20s releases, namely the D&R tracks from BC21-30. It's been fantastic, the reception has been wonderful, and the decibels have been rising. I realise many of us (including myself) do love the tracks from these releases, and have been having a blast in class.
These releases were the ones that I'm most familiar with, because this was the period when I started falling in love with BC, and started to notice the tracks. I was trained in BC27, started TT during BC29 days, and my first proper new release was BC30.
Back then because there weren't that many releases and tracks to choose from, I mainly rotated from BC21-30 post-launch, with the occasional odd tracks from BC13-20. No offence to Nathaniel and Gabby, but I just prefer Dan & Rach's tracks.
Even now, the memories of yesteryear still linger strongly and I can still remember how I felt when the releases were launched.
I didn't remember much about BC21/22 - maybe I didn't really enjoy the releases then. BC23 was the first release where I really loved the music and moves. The mickey mouse tone in 'Stuck On You' where everyone would automatically shout on the RH kicks. Then there was 'Field of Dreams', which was love at first hear, and how the crowd loved doing the 'Energy' part. Even 18 releases later, Field of Dreams is one of my all time favourites. 'Hardcore Paradise' blew me away then. I couldn't get enough of it, though now it's slightly more subdued cos I found other MT tracks I like more. What about that shoulder blaster in 'Retro Rush'. Solid. 'Breathe Easy' had that lovely kata.
BC24, after such a fantastic BC23 release, was a letdown. From the get-go, I think participants were disappointed. The warm up deviated from the usual shout on RH kicks, cos the choreo was a shuffle forward then RH. A bit of momentum lost there. I remember how our gang simply refused to do the circular uppercuts in 'I Feel Alive'. 'She Bangs' was probably a universal disaster across classes as most people didn't want to get down on the floor. The other tracks didn't really capture our imagination.
BC25 was a release I remember for special reason. I bumped into this instructor (shan't reveal who) who was practising the new release, and I basically got a full preview of the entire class prior to launch. The release was a breath of fresh air. Catchy songs such as 'Angels' and 'Luv U More' wowed the crowd, and it was hilarious when people couldn't get the step pattern in the latter track. 'Jigga Jigga' - what adjective can I allocate this track? At that point of time, I could have sworn it was the best track ever. 'Power of Love' the speedball and stomp track is from this release too. Everyone loved it. The T7/8 combo of 'Electro Violence' and 'Crescendoes of Ecstasy' wasn't the instructors' favourites, but they have remained one of my favourites even now.
BC26 - a semi-letdown? The upper warm up was dreadfully boring, 'Scream' was a power track that virtually all instructors (including myself) have binned. The redeeming factor for this release was T7/8 - 'Rhythm & Police' and 'Night Life'. The dark music got the mood going and I can hardly remember the number of times I got high on these 2 tracks. There were hits and misses for this release.
BC27 - I trained in this release, and did it so many times in training that I got a little bored of the release when it was finally launched. There were a few fantastic tracks in this release. During launch, I felt that the warm up was the best ever. The 'Bom Bom Suenan' sounds really got me going. 'Genie in a Bottle' was slightly subdued but there were refreshing tracks such as 'Tribal Dance', 'Bad & Sexy'. 'So What' was the feature of the release for me with its jump knees. 'Neckbreaker' busted my lungs. How about the cooldown - what a lovely way to finish the class.
BC28 - This was the first ever release that I liked T1 to T8. 'The Final Countdown', 'Come With Me' came from this release. Who could possibly hate 'Hymn'? Such an energetic number. During launch, I knew the classes hated 'Hung Up'. It was something different and many people just walked out. I was disappointed. Then there was 'Fight' - the first ever Rock based Muay Thai track, which I love to bits even now. Then 'Reach Out'? I loved the buildup for this track. The best thing from this release? The cooldown - Because Of You.
BC29 - This was a very good release that featured the double knife strike in the warm up as well as T6 - 'Vogue'. I knew several instructors hated 'Action' but not me. I loved 'Fly Away' and 'Heartbeatz'. There was one track which I binned - 'Blade'. Loved the cooldown 'Broken'.
BC30 - This was the first release that I had to learn as an instructor and I can't really comment from the participant point of view. All I can say is that I'm ashamed that I hated this release from the start (just after receiving the DVD) because after I practised and launched the full class, I loved this release to bits. Fav tracks include the lower warm up 'Somebody Told Me', 'Shooting Star', 'Rock Me Amadeus' - love love love this ESK track! Those were the days when I was still starting out new, and I was terribly conscious of the fact that I'll not be a good role model if I can't execute the ESK well, so I definitely spent some time practising this move. I kept doing ESK tracks in my class and had to endure a series of walkouts for this track. Guess 11 releases down the road, this has paid dividends.
Well, I've written a bit more than what I had expected to, all this just came to mind and I wrote it all out. Sometimes I really miss being just a participant, where I don't know much and can just enjoy my class as it is. But it's like once you've swam to the other shore, you can't really swim back.
Monday, October 19, 2009
Leave And Travel
With 2.5 months to go before 2010, I daresay that I've more or less wrapped up my travel plans for the year.
There's a mini weekend getaway to Genting, as well as a quarterly trip (extended) to Bangkok, though I have a little issue of having another 4 days to clear. The initial plan was to go London (that fell through for reasons I loathe to mention), plan B was to go Auckland for another round of filming but now I have to cast it aside as I've booked myself to Genting during filming period, and plan C... I'm just stuck there for the time being. Got a friend who wants to go but can't confirm.
When I started working, and didn't have much money, I yearned for more moolah in my bank account. I did foolish things like selling my much coveted leave back to the company for more pay (at junior level compensation too). In retrospect, that was silly.
Now that I've worked for a few years, and have a healthy bank balance, the thing I yearn for most is leave. Those precious days where you can basically do anything you want. I'll be the first to admit that I have travelled quite a bit this year, but hey, since when is travelling enough?
The last thing I want is to spend the 4 days rotting in Singapore, but then again, where can I go, or rather, where should I go? I'm perfectly comfortable going to a foreign land by myself, so I'm wondering if I should go ahead with the booking and wait for my friend to just join me if schedule permits.
I've travelled for many purposes - sightseeing, relaxation, business trips, LM filming, quarterlies, so I'm trying to find something new. And this new thing could be - travelling for sporting events.
I'm an avid football fan and tennis fan as well so the idea definitely appeals to me. Travel to a different part of the world to catch a sporting event. Kinda like my trip to Europe this year where I caught the Roland Garros (French Open tennis) Men's final. That was spontaneous and wasn't planned and cost me a mini bomb. 300 Euros for the ticket.
And talking about cost considerations, going for sporting events isn't cheap. Just the thought of ticket prices is enough to scare most people. It's difficult as it is to find a fellow enthusiast, but it's even more freaking difficult to find someone who is willing to pay such prices.
Shall I shelf the plans?
There's a mini weekend getaway to Genting, as well as a quarterly trip (extended) to Bangkok, though I have a little issue of having another 4 days to clear. The initial plan was to go London (that fell through for reasons I loathe to mention), plan B was to go Auckland for another round of filming but now I have to cast it aside as I've booked myself to Genting during filming period, and plan C... I'm just stuck there for the time being. Got a friend who wants to go but can't confirm.
When I started working, and didn't have much money, I yearned for more moolah in my bank account. I did foolish things like selling my much coveted leave back to the company for more pay (at junior level compensation too). In retrospect, that was silly.
Now that I've worked for a few years, and have a healthy bank balance, the thing I yearn for most is leave. Those precious days where you can basically do anything you want. I'll be the first to admit that I have travelled quite a bit this year, but hey, since when is travelling enough?
The last thing I want is to spend the 4 days rotting in Singapore, but then again, where can I go, or rather, where should I go? I'm perfectly comfortable going to a foreign land by myself, so I'm wondering if I should go ahead with the booking and wait for my friend to just join me if schedule permits.
I've travelled for many purposes - sightseeing, relaxation, business trips, LM filming, quarterlies, so I'm trying to find something new. And this new thing could be - travelling for sporting events.
I'm an avid football fan and tennis fan as well so the idea definitely appeals to me. Travel to a different part of the world to catch a sporting event. Kinda like my trip to Europe this year where I caught the Roland Garros (French Open tennis) Men's final. That was spontaneous and wasn't planned and cost me a mini bomb. 300 Euros for the ticket.
And talking about cost considerations, going for sporting events isn't cheap. Just the thought of ticket prices is enough to scare most people. It's difficult as it is to find a fellow enthusiast, but it's even more freaking difficult to find someone who is willing to pay such prices.
Shall I shelf the plans?
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