Tough Week

A stark realisation that I haven't had a proper blog entry for 2 weeks, I remind myself that I better jot down my thoughts lest I forget and procrastinate again. This is going to be another of those 'write what I'm feeling now' entries so pardon the messiness and structureless entry.

In all honesty, I would probably have expected an entry from myself earlier in the week, in the aftermath of the big event for PF- Mega Combat 2008. But I was simply too preoccupied with other stuff and I have conveniently neglected this part of my life, albeit with some niggling guilt.

I didn't have a particularly enjoyable MC this year, nothing to do with the event, but more of the fact that I was saddled with an illness that spanned a week. On the day itself, I had a flaring sore throat that was refusing to subside in spite of me downing bottles of 'liang cha'. If I was feeling better, I think I would have enjoyed the event as I've always had in the past two years. This is my third MC and I hope that this event continues in perpetuity, with a blatant disregard of the corporate movements that the insiders are privy to. I relish every moment, and it is my desire that even in my 50s and when my knees are failing, I'll be able to participate and say, "Hey, I was up there more than 20 years ago."

My personal gratitude goes out to Lynn, who 'sacrificed' her workout to capture shots of us in action, and she has even kindly provided me with a copy of her compilation. Not to mention a lengthy entry that's worth reading, every single word of it. Without sounding too cliche, I would say to Lynn like what I always say to her when we meet - "These are the memories that keep us going, and remind us that our sacrifices are worth it."

The week in retrospect, it has been so emotionally trying for me. Even for Cancerians like myself who have emotional upheavals and moodswings every single day, this week has been rough. I had a premonition and it seemed like I just lived out one of my worst nightmares ever. The memories linger, and as much as I hate to acknowledge it, these experiences affect my standing with people around me and vice versa.

The illness compounded matters further. I had to contend with a doctor proclaiming that 'my throat isn't that bad' and I don't require antibiotics despite me knowing my condition better. For the record, 3 docs in the space of 3 days isn't good news. The weekend one out of convenience, the Mon one was during work, and the Tue one was my trusted family doctor, after my throat decided it would go 'full blast' - I quote Jean.

MC 2 days just before my getaway. Talk about uncanny timing and sheer coincidences.

I wished I wasn't sick before my trip. Sore throats are the worst thing to have next to mouth ulcers. They make you feel real grouchy and snappy, and worst of all, you can't eat anything! But saying so, the first bite of ice-cream, and first sip of Coke after the self-imposed abstinence was absolute bliss. Ice-cold Coke in cubes of ice. Simple pleasures of life.

I didn't really venture much given my condition, and I stayed away from any form of physical strenuous activity, limiting myself to a dip in the pool. In the coming week ahead, I will strive to attend as many classes as possible to regain my dropping levels of fitness, exacerbated by me relinquishing my weekday classes and me juggling my new work commitments.

During my absence from my regular time slots this week, I felt a real disconnect from the gym and everything associated with it. It was subdued until one moment of recollecting my thoughts, I realised that I do miss conducting classes after all. There was such a strong innate desire to get my ass back and do it again. Sometimes I ask myself, "What would happen one day if I stop conducting classes for good?" Of course this needless thought masks the positive news I've received from my new employers. My boss OK-ed my part-time so I don't have to be oh-so-secretive about it and live a double life as I did in my previous employment.

This sounds insane, but during my trip, I was actually planning what tracks I wanted to teach when I return, despite it being more than a week away. BC36 has been good, but too much of something is boring, and I'm kinda excited to mix tracks again.

Till then, I think I shall sign off for now, and start thinking what I want to write next. A belated MC entry, replete with all those wonderful pics that Lynn took? Perhaps.